Wednesday, August 12, 2015
Of self-indulgent harmful whims
Following pride, caution cast aside
Now exposed to these stinging winds
Why should they be coerced to play
Games which only go my way
As I design their hurt inside
Unable to stop this every day
As threads now fray, and chaos reigns
And links are tainted by my stains
My screams constrained by my silent side
Desperate to take their pain away
Monday, January 21, 2013
Popping like a gunshot in the night -
You hear it, but the direction cannot be tracked,
Eyes of yours scanning left and right,
Your mind projecting shadows slipping just out of sight.
Will I be enemy or ally? Friend or foe?
Finding and asking me, the only way you can know.
Do you fear just the concept?
What of me can one not accept?
Regardless of faction, you've awakened this construct.
Adapting through anything, stability in fluidity,
Chaos surrounding, my embrace - lucidity,
Unsafe to those who don't know safety.
Saturday, July 14, 2012
Granted, to expect one to solve from one sentence
my entire intricate pretense
may be seen as less help than hindrance.
Yet in this single instance
in which I test my own patience,
I continue to practice avoidance.
Such is this unseen, sophisticated dance,
which, unbeknown to you, is your only chance.
Friday, June 29, 2012
Wars and ways will shield me from you
Blood boiled black, colder than ice,
Heart held hostage, heat-hardened thrice
Passion forged by fire
With a mind pushed through frozen hell
Seamless mirrors disguising tripwires
Protecting that hard as diamond shell
So you can see it - irrelevant
You'll never breach it's perimeter,
Never reach it's internal tenant.
This is the home I know,
Where by my will, time moves slow,
My eyes bring order where chaos flows,
The methods of which I'll never show.
Dare you evict me from this home?
Knowing without it, I've nowhere to go?
Would you loose this beast upon them?
Or stand with me until the end?
Or do you intend to solve this labyrinth,
with no claim to the prize within?
Do you play the same game as I?
Wednesday, November 9, 2011
So be scared,
You won't be able to withstand the attack
Once the blood in my heart is boiling black
Storms, hurricanes, quakes and flames
Fly to find those the spider names,
No, not a soul will hear your screams
When blood and darkness fill your dreams,
A landscape which you can't escape,
Doesn't matter which path you take
Can't be changed by any choice you make
This spider's mark can not be healed,
Once venom sets in, your fate is sealed.
Wednesday, December 1, 2010
Alarms and tripwires set to wake me to anyone
Daring to enter this bastion of my isolation,
Prepared to gun down any without hesitation
Intention discretion irrelevant to my reaction,
Blind defense to guard this place,
Concealing sins in the closets, not brave enough to face
Their poisons, aging scars my sleeping fingers trace,
From battles won and lost and memories erased...
Tuesday, October 26, 2010
Written on my phone.
Using monochrome paint swatches
For a spectrum-wide color sketch
Pencil lines cant be seen on the canvas,
Watercolors bleeding through the page,
Wish I could show you why this is,
Without the internal war I'd wage
To maintain my ability to remain half-sane,
While retaining the energy to clearly explain.
Sunday, October 10, 2010
Finding a way to start to overcome this
Sandstorm of bullets and sword strikes of lies,
Finding it's blinded as the wind whips its eyes,
Losing direction and unable to find
The way to link back to its body and mind
Turning away to recover its sight,
But still can't see as the sun's blindingly bright,
And although it knows well that nothing is right,
It continues to fight on with all of its might,
Hoping the winds will be calmer one night,
Allow it to find another like it to unite
With and both find a way to conquer the haze,
And build up a way to beat back the forays
Of attacks amplified by the sun's white-hot rays,
Find a way back to the body and mind,
To a home in which both could reside,
And could know that once they make it inside,
There's no bullets to dodge, and nothing to hide.
Wednesday, April 28, 2010
Wondering when it was that I got this feeling,
Maybe I'm just reeling, or is someone stealing,
The flame I had inside me that kept me killing,
Close my eyes and faces flash like an off track film reel,
Mind's racing back and forth trying to see what is real,
And for an instant I can hear those voices,
That would all still be around if I made different choices,
I blink and there I am under the stars just lyin'
Thinking and reflecting as I watch Orion,
Analyzing life and thinkin' I might be dyin',
Cause even with this grief it turns out I'm not cryin',
There's nothing I can do and trust me I do know that,
Three could maybe help but I know one won't come back,
One mistakes my actions as lethal combat,
The other gets scared and has to pull back,
So I don't know what to say or do but life still goes on,
Step by step I'll trudge along until it's all gone,
And once this merciless wave of shots have all been bested,
This tired soldier you know now will find some rest.
Saturday, February 13, 2010
So we face the world with mile wide smiles
(Knowing inside our eyes are on fire)
They see the twinkle of trust in our eyes
(When deep down inside we want them to die)
Use our lives for the masses of friends
(But under our skin the anger never ends)
It’s a lonely wasteland,
Being the hero of the hour
The envy in the desert sand
Turns it all desolate, except for one flower
The flower of the one who sees the truth
(When I met you my heart was ice
Chipped from pain and melting away
They’d turn up the heat with their lies
And leave me there to fade away
Until you let me see the truth)
We still let them think we’re so naïve
(The twinkle in our eyes are really knives)
They’ll never get it, they’ll never see
(The silent truths of you and me)
The world thinks we purely hate each other
(But we couldn’t live without one another)
So we’ll let them think they know it all
(And we’ll laugh when all of them fall)
So go on, world, go on and doubt us
Do your best and try to attack us
Give us all you got
Cause we both know when it comes to the end