"Breaking and Entering", October 30th, 2008

The shockwaves it set off left cracks in the floor,
I'm tripping over them as I stumble to the door,
Falling on my face while looking for something more,
Without even knowing what that doorway has in store,
The black lights turn on showing the fingerprints on the scene,
No matter how much I scrub away the stains, they're never clean,
What I once believed was red has now become green,
The damage they left behind is worse than what I've ever seen,
Broken down door crashes as it falls,
Can't wash the blame off the mud-stained floors and walls,
Trying to rest in a bed that's been torn apart,
Need to rebuild but I don't know where to start.

"Recovery Road" October 9th, 2008

Recovery's become a mountain, comprised completely of only shale,
Rising at such an angle, it's near impossible to scale,
Racing against the clock, while the world pressures you to wait,
Although you know the summit is the only remaining escape,
From those who clutch and grab at you, try to hold you back,
Running from their raging fire which turns all it touches black,
You spend each second climbing, but you don't know what's at the top,
All you know is you'll become their prey if you decide to stop,
You reach the summit only to find it's the first of an endless range,
Looking at the ground in front, you see the surface change,
As well as footsteps from those who've taken this journey prior,
Still visible in the distance are their figures climbing higher,
At the end of this rocky path is the happiness you desire,
But now is time to rest, you've escaped that frenzied fire,
This road, slick and dangerous, is better faced with two,
Not a one who went alone has ever made it through,
So here is the place to rest, and sleep secure tonight,
The one you're meant to travel with will come when the time is right.

"Short and Sour", September 29th, 2008

You treated my emotions with an element of fluidity,
An interrogative relationship, always questioning their validity,
I'll never forget those bladed words that you said to me,
Cut so deeply that they've become scarred into my memory,
"Time heals all wounds.", not a falser statement exists,
For the wounds of the suicidal will always show upon their wrists,
While I myself do not appear upon that groups member lists,
The scars I hold will be ever present from all your dagger twists.

Saturday, September 13th, 2008 - "Truth"

In the end, you'll see what I've done
Not yet - cause it's only begun,
Soon enough you'll believe that I'm the one,
And when I'm through, you'll be shot with your own gun.

I'm the one that you'll need in the end,
The one whose will can't break or bend,
Those who accept me will be the ones I defend,
The ones to which my hand will extend.

You feared my intensity,
But just explain to me
Why my tenacity
Made me so untrustworthy
Maybe one day you can see
What it is I tried to be
What they call insanity
Is only personality

I'm the one that you'll need in the end,
The one whose will can't break or bend,
Those who accept me will be the ones I defend,
The ones to which my hand will extend.

And when you're trapped, with the flames burning higher,
And the very air around you is unbearably hotter,
I'll remember the day you labeled me a liar,
I'll sit back and watch as the fire starts your slaughter,
You'll regret ever having tried to conspire
Against the strongest of all, you shouldn't have bothered,
Your whole plan of attack will start to backfire,
And this time, you can't paint yourself as a martyr.

"Silent Screaming Spiral", August 9th, 2008

The spiral inside haunting me daily,
My usual methods to deal with it, failing,
Falling away from all I knew, flailing,
Pressing on through the race of life but trailing.

No matter what, these are silent screams,
Now dealing with all this and violent dreams,
Bonds are broken, a heart tearing at the seams,
Can someone please tell me when the pain will cease?
It rips me to shreds, piece after piece falls apart,
I'd work through it all but I've no place to start,
Without resorting to crystallizing this now bleeding heart,
And forcing every current emotion to depart.

July 30th, 2008 - "Frozen House of Wax"

Please, please, try to understand,
Difficult for me to show you my hands,
Fearing that you will not see the scars,
Tears in my eyes, gleaming like stars,
Both disappear as the sun rises again.

Hand fell into the pan as I flew off the handle,
Impossible to heal, trying to light a frozen candle,
Will never succeed, instead will always fail,
A castle constructed with well-rusted nails,
Appearing strong, in reality, a house of cards.

Stare straight into my eyes, brave one,
See these things I've said and done,
See the shame, the pride, the perceived modesty,
Look past that and find the fear of honesty,
This castle has a pure basis of lies.

The lies from those whom I've destroyed,
Have built this place completely devoid,
Of windows, doors, or even a gate,
But I refuse to resign myself to the fate,
That it shall fall like a house of cards.

Take my poisoned truth and keep it alive,
Just waiting for my second wind to arrive,
Wishing that you'd show me truth's not a ghost,
Just because I am less trusting than most,
Is that enough reason to break this glass heart,
To prove to me what I have known from the start,
That melding with me would tear anyone apart?

Sick, Twisted, Evil, Wrong, July 6th, 2008

"You're sick."
It's a sentence I hear whenever I plan,
Every time I choose to destroy those who ran,
Every calculated move I make,
Every analyzed step I take -
It's all just "Sick."

"You're twisted."
The phrase I hear when you learn my motive,
To completely alter the way these people live,
Not content until we raise the stakes,
By the end your fear will make you shake,
I'm completely "twisted."

"You're evil."
The words I hear at every turn,
The opposite, a fact they'll never learn,
For I destroy to let them rebuild,
Minds don't reincarnate till the old is killed,
I must be "evil."

"You're wrong."
The two syllables, nothing short of truthless,
My determination comes off as simply ruthless,
Don't criticize and try to stop what you don't understand,
Don't challenge - you don't want to see me make a stand,
I'm never "wrong."

"Neither Time Nor Lies Will Stop Us" June 26, 2008

Immortalized within that single camera shutter,
Is the realization that I'll never need another,
Watch the butterflies in your eyes start to flutter,
See the words in my throat begin to stutter,
As your smile cuts through the pain and clears away the clutter,
Looking in my eyes you'll see I wouldn't have it any other
Way than to have you be the one that's always on my mind,
Be the inspiration behind each of these very lines,
The only one I need to think of to develop all these rhymes,
No matter what's going on, when I'm in your arms I'm fine,
We lose ourselves in each other, lose all sense of time,
But even time wouldn't understand the feelings we hold inside,
No matter the words they say, forget their countless lies,
It's my heart that's my drive, that knows that I want you to be mine,
It's not up to them, the now and future is only for us to decide,
It's not their place to tell us who should be the one by our side,
What we've got is one of a kind, something those fools will never find,
Every word of what I write still feels so right,
Even though it hasn't even been forty nights,
It still feels like I've known you all my life,
Every time I see you the world is once again bright,
Even though the time I've known you has been so slight,
It still feels like I've known you all my life.

"Unfinished Scream", June 14th, 2008.

Where do we go from here?
The dreams you won't give up on
Kill the dreams my sights are set on.
Can't influence what you decide,
Have to keep all the fears inside,
Find a place for my thoughts to hide.
Can't shake the feeling that I'm an aside,
Something to add to the thrill of the ride,
Until you cross to the next waves of the tide.
I'll be left here, alone and stranded,
Unable to swim in this sea, I'll be abandoned,
Won't make it there if you're waiting at the shore.

"Riverside" - May 18th, 2008

Giving up this part of me
Shatter it so you can be
Happy and free as the fish at sea,
While my nights alone, you can't see,
The sinking feeling just won't cease,
My heart's not an apartment lease,
Spend some time there then up and leave,
You're turning the page, I'm lost in the crease,
You had this total shell of mine breached,
You had been were no one else had reached,
Each of us, so much to learn, so much to teach,
I saw it, and clung to it, becoming a leech,
Digging this hole of mine deeper with each
Passing day, no matter how much I beg and plead,
Within these words which I've no doubt you'll read,
No matter how much my soul leaks and bleeds,
It's the pain like this upon which my closed heart feeds,
I'm always subject to everyone else's needs,
Your whims the wind to my river's reeds,
Left alone to wish to be plucked from the weeds.